Way back in the “good old days” I was getting sick about once a month. Like clockwork. As soon as I started picking up the pieces after the Hurricane came through, started eating solid food, and taking vitamins again I didn’t get sick. For eight months I ate right, slept right, and breathed right (I no longer use nor need an inhaler to get me through a 120 minute session of racquetball). Since April I’ve been a steady mid 160 pounder. Pity I still can’t think right.

Well, it caught up with me finally. I was not alone in my terror though. Almost everyone I know out here in the land of sunshine and frozen grass came down with something at the beginning of December. My pain was only temporary – lasting about 5 days but I’m still hacking up the vagabonds that refuse to leave.

This has to be the first year that Christmas seems like a real non-event. Yes, my parents will be visiting. Yes, I’m happy about that. Yes, I’m hard at work putting together a four day itinerary based on my mother’s suggestions from the AAA guide. No, December doesn’t have the same meaning as in other years; in fact, every other year. Instead of another climactic ending to a lackluster year, I’ll see a climactic year go out like a lamb.

Is this a byproduct of being an adult? Of being single? Of being naturally pessimistic?

Last month was the most successful for Long Image in its short history.

I had my real estate agent submit an offer for a killer condo in Encino on Wednesday.

The Buckeyes are cruising to a national championship.

I’m probably in the best shape of my life (or close to it).

I’m technically a member of the “executive” council at work.

Girls seem to think I have a nice car.

So what is my problem? Why am I not happy?

Waiting for positive reinforcement from my significant other…….

Oh wait – that’s right.

I hear all the time that one must be happy with oneself before they can enter into a relationship with someone else. I wonder if these people are just arrogant. I seem to work completely the opposite. I get the most amount of work done- accomplish the most – when I’m unhappy. But doesn’t that make sense? We get our paychecks after doing the work, not before. If I’m happy with myself I’ll feel no drive to improve myself. Nobody is perfect – so wouldn’t that imply that anyone who is truly happy with themselves is a narcissist (and believe me, I’ve received great training in how to spot one)? Are these women who are “totally independent” the ones you want to avoid?

Sometimes (read as 99% of the time) I think I might be better of being celibate for ten years. Then I realized I haven’t touched a woman in six months and I go back to match.com and get rejected by 99 jpegs (yes I’m using your phrase Aaron – but I’m giving you credit for it) and accepted, if only for a moment, by 1.

It looks like I fixed the links that didn’t work on this blog. I have more work to do, and to do as soon as possible.